I take the words “friend” and “friendship” VERY seriously. It’s something that I’ve always taken seriously. I have VERY few friends and I do this for a reason. Every week, I’m not calling someone a friend. My friends are the types that actually earn that term. I’ve made a few mistakes. Probably TWO (IF that) but I take my friendships VERY seriously. Most of the people I call ‘friend’ have been that for a decade or more in many cases. With that said, when I call you a friend, that means that I will fight for you. That’s what I do and I usually do that with full confidence that the other party would do the same for me. If I put myself out there for a person, you are truly my friend.
I look around Facebook a lot (I’m about to cut down my time on there as well) and notice that people get stabbed the back by people that they quickly labeled “friend” almost every day. People say that my approach is a defense mechanism and I’ll take that. But there aren’t too many folks out here that I really care about. You have to earn my caring for you. If you’re just a crappy person, you can keep that.
As for honesty, I’m extremely honest. Again, to a fault. If and when I do or say something, I’m telling you the truth. I can’t sweeten my words or make them sound better because, sometimes, we need that brutally honest person to tell us the truth. I’m even brutally honest with myself. I evaluate myself a LOT. It’s something that I learned to do in my psychology classes. Before you can analyze someone else, you should be able to analyze yourself and figure out why you are the way you are, why you think the way you do, etc. This life is full of lessons that we learn DAILY. Hey, I make mistakes; I’ve made plenty. But I OWN them. I’ve never NOT owned my mistakes because NOT owning them means you’re not learning. And if you don’t learn, you’ll keep making the same mistake again. Mama doesn’t like making the same mistake numerous times. This goes back to having TRUE friends.
I like people that aren’t scared of me. I like people that give it to me straight. Sure, I’m a big girl with a hard exterior but I am one of the BEST friends that people will ever have. I don’t consider someone that doesn’t honestly care about me to be a friend. And it takes a lot for me to care about certain people because they truly don’t deserve my thoughts or my heart. Yes, my heart is in my friendships. To me, ALL relationships should start on the foundation of friendship. Men usually get mad when they feel that they’re in the “friend” zone and I think that those people are stupid and clearly have no true motive when trying to get to know me. If you don’t want to be my friend, then WHY would I want to date you? If I’m not even good enough to be your friend, then why would I want to have a long term relationship with you?
I’m a weird type of animal. But this is just more of my ranting.